Dear Diary

A few years ago a book came out that I snapped up and read immediately. It was the eight year journal that President Ronald Reagan wrote while he was in the White House. He made a journal entry almost every day and it was fascinating to see the historic decisions and events that occurred during his presidency as they developed in his daily thoughts. It caused me to think about my own life on a day to day basis. Even though my existence is not the ‘world leader’ type of excitement that a presidents is, maybe my grandchildren and great grandchildren would find it entertaining to read along on a daily basis all the trials and tribulations I go thorough.

As I considered the idea I wondered about what other famous people might have written in their journals. Here are a few and what I think they may have written.

Marilyn Monroe; I am going to sing Happy Birthday to the President Kennedy at a party tonight. I’m a little nervous that I might forget the words.”

Benjamin Franklin: Got in another fight with the wife tonight. Usually these arguments turn out bad, but tonight she told me to go fly a kite so I did and you’ll never guess what happened.

Elvis: I asked the Colonel today, “Does this blue jumpsuit make my butt look big?” He answered, “No, it’s the 20 peanut butter and banana sandwiches you have for breakfast every morning.”

Teddy Roosevelt; I’m working on a speech for tomorrow about America and how we should defend our country. I want a strong closing line and I think I’ve got it. ‘Speak softly and carry a big pillow.’ No, that’s not quite it.

President Kennedy; Marilyn Monroe is suppose to sing Happy Birthday to me at the party tonight. I hope she doesn’t forget the words.

Thomas Edison; Well, today I tried the seventh different material for the filament in my light bulb and it failed. I got to be close, probably just a couple more.

Richard Nixon; This morning I told the press, “I am not a crook.” Even I didn’t believe it.

Al Gore; My newest invention the Internet is almost done. Next week I will try to invent global warming.

Oscar the Grouch; I’m so tired of having everyone ask me why I’m so grouchy. If you had Henson’s hand up your furry green ass all day you’d be a little grouchy too.

Thomas Edison; Okay that’s it. Today I tried the nine thousand, five hundredth different material for the filament in my electric light bulb idea. It’s obvious now that it’s just not going to happen. I think I’ll work on a brighter oil lamp.

On second thought I guess my family can just read my PERK UP columns in the stacks of newspapers all over the house if they want to know what I was up to every day. Have a great week.